Handyman Service

Green Owl is proud to offer Handyman Services to Orange and the surrounding area.

All odd jobs, big and small, can be completed in a timely, professional matter.

We can:

Fix windows

Replace doors

Change locks

Patch or fix holes in walls

Paint rooms

Build flatpack furniture and exercise equipment

Fix tiling issues

Change lightbulbs

Build garden beds

Move heavy things (fridges, pianos, furniture)

Or do just about anything a big, strong bloke with a ute can do!


Call Clayton today on 0402253178
We usually quote on the same day!












The Handyman

The Handyman he comes he knocks

hello there you've got it blocked?

or stuck or jammed or busted broke

or "my old wagon needs a spoke"

And so he goes in to his kit

to scratch his head and think a bit

what will it take to get it done?

where IS that bit? oh here's the one

and starts to make the house right once more

until he hears the ma'am deplore

"this blasted window's always tight

'twill not budge try as I might!"

so in he goes to see the fuss

and wonky sash "shave that I must"

and so heads  back to job begun

there to resume, before long runs

into the room the ma'am she shrieks

"to the laundry, the tap! it leaks!"

so job 1, sash and washer too

then "can you look at chook house too?

and gutters too, and tiles are cracked

and palings where the kids have wacked

the cricket ball into the fence

'twit weren't for you it'd be down hence!

"Oh thank you much you're a gem and true"

so he heads to gate and through

jobs are done and ma'am is charmed

so he heads to his own house ma'amed

where the washers leak and the drawers are stuck

and memory spurned he sighs "ahh f***"

I had quite forgotten to do the bits 

that separates wife from the sh*ts.



Anon.